I wake up and brush teeth cause no one likes stank morning breath. After I’ve scrubbed my mouthbones and gargled with hellfire (yellow Listerine), I make tea and eat a balanced breakfast. Four eggs, sourdough bread with extra butter, and some form of sugar.
When I’m fat(er) and happy, I’ll sit down to write and bang out 5k. With me feeling smarter than everyone else (because I didn’t misspell narrcisssstic the first time) I watch a movie.
Mind you, choosing a film will take from ten to eighty minutes, depending on my mood. I loveeeeee movies so this isn’t anything new. By 2 I’m laughing, crying, or reciting lines. Possibly all three because I’m watching Tombstone for the 40th time.
At around 5 I log into Roblox or COD Warfare. Now folks, here’s where time gets really tricky. From the moment I load up or choose a game time begins to sprint. We’re not playing with regular, excruciatingly long work days here. Noooooo, these are video game hours so, one hour is actually ten minutes.
At 12 am I look at the clock and shout, “Yo what the fuck! It was just five!”
And thus ends a beautiful day where I do what I want and when!
Tag: writers life
Keep On Keeping On
This month didn’t begin how I’d hoped. Before the election, I was filled with anxiety and now, I am trying to pick myself up. I am trying to write, trying to live, trying not to dwell on the future. It is hard! As a Black queer woman, I am TRYING to find peace while I stand in the aftermath.
This will be a rough four years and I don’t know what lay ahead. I can only hope the universe will see fit to align and intervene. This can not be it. I have faith in humanity and in our community but I am allowed a cynical moment. We are allowed to be angry with EVERYONE!
While the silver lining may not be within reach I must believe it is there. I have to keep my eyes on the horizon. This is not toxic positivity bullshit. I am not preaching, I am talking myself into power and strength. Which I, as an individual, need so very badly. I tend to lean toward pessimism but I don’t want to be that person right now. I can’t afford to think as I always do.
As I move forward in a nation divided I can only TRY MY FUCKING BEST to get along the only way I know how…
I will write word, after word, after word, until I make myself smile.
The Season to Smile!!
Welcome to fall and Libra season! It’s only the best time of year for those who love spooky seasons, torrential weather, annnnd darkness! I am a moonchild and love nocturnal life. I have said this before, but it requires repeating, I love dusk. I love sunsets and crackling fires. I feel at home beneath the stars and a full hunter’s moon. Mother Luna is my bestie!
So, it comes as no surprise that I hate long days. This time of year is for US!
With Pretty Much Anything
I tend to find joy in various hobbies and such. I relax by reading, writing, playing video games, or by watching a movie. Tea relaxes me as well. Nothing major. Oh, and i might bake something if I’m in the mood.
Sad Girl Summer is Almost Over!!!
Here’s to a beautiful new month and Bi romance month! I love y’all! I am coming into my season and feeling better! I have said it a few times already, but I’m gonna let y’all know, summer makes me sad. I get in my feelings and I feel like shit from May to July. I’m just noooot, at my best. I’m unhappy and sappy. My vibes are at their lowest during those insufferable summer months. Granted, we are still in the summer swing, but the hot hoe is reaching its end. I can feel it in the air!.
Most hate fall and winter, but not eyyyye. We prefer them colder months over here. The sun and I have a contentious connection. I do not like her, and she don’t like me. I love the nocturnal and gloomy with my entire heart. I thrive during frigid winter nights. Dreary and dark is where I draw inspiration and vitality. I prefer dusk over dawn and rain to sunshine. It is who i am, and with summer approaching its inevitable end, I can breathe with ease.
My goal for this month is to be. Just, be. Be gentle with myself. Be at peace. Be calm. Be the positivity I wish to attract. Also, I just wanna write. I want to write what I WANT AND NOT CARE! I do that already, but when you’re a SM junkie, all the advice and takes can dampen ones creativity and mood. There are A LOT of opinions out there about the art of writing, but I don’t give a shit. I just don’t care.
AUTHORS & WRITERS CAN’T CARE! AND WE SHOULDN’T.
iyI’ve been doing this too long, I know better! Yes, I am a reader as well i know how we can get about our opinions, but as an author and a writer, that spce is not for me to dwell. Reader opinions are just that, and I can’t take any of it to heart. It will only hinder my ability to create. I have decided to block those posts and tweets, because they can be harmful. This is not me saying they shouldn’t post them, I don’t care, post whatever you want. That’s what the mute button is for. Some of y’all need to learn about it too. Anyway. I’m rambling but, you get it. I’m a mess. It’s Inevitable. I’m gonna veer. I’m a habitual veer=er! With all of that, I say have a nice day, drink water, and don’t be KHHNT!
“My alma mater was books, a good library…. I could spend the rest of my life reading, just satisfying my curiosity.” – Malcolm X
To Be Grown and Queer
In my youth, I was so worried about what my bible carrying father would do to me if he found out I was bi. I played the straight role for more than half my life. Though, my choice in attire had folks assuming I was a lesbian.
Because you know, keeping shit androgynous instantly makes someone queer.
[INSERT EYEROLL]
When I was ten years old, I watched as a family member was shunned and condemned by relatives after coming out. Their cruelty made a lasting impression. My own father stopped talking to this person and had nothing but terrible things to say about them.
Can you imagine how scared I was? His reaction caused me to withdraw and cower. I pushed my queerness down and forced myself into a box I never fit in.
It was rough for many years. I am proud to say I have gotten over and grown out of that hellish religious trauma.
Three immediate family members still don’t know I’m bisexual. Yes, one being my father. The other two, I just don’t care enough to tell them. I know how they’d take it and I don’t need that, type of negativity in my life.
Fuck that, I don’t want a lecture, I don’t need to be read scriptures that gave me nightmares as a child. I don’t need their opinions or upturned noses.
We’re not obligated to disclose our sexuality. You don’t have to tell a soul. I live in my truth daily. I don’t need their validation or support, because I have learned to love and accept myself.
Those of y’all who know, KNOW. Growing up in a Baptist environment will have you hating yourself and projecting. This is a struggle! I don’t withhold this information due to shame, no.
I JUST DON’T CARE ANYMORE.
I’ve reached a certain age where I truly don’t give damn. I look at my reflection and smile. I love her. I love this woman. I love who she is and what she has done and will do.
I’ll be damned to let anybody badmouth me for extending myself grace and love. You cannot let them steal your joy!
J. T. Frost 